Girls and Boys

WHY DO GIRLS DON'T SHUT UP and WHY DO BOYS DON'T LISTEN?

I'm not a professional to say that I know the reasons behind this menace. But I don't need to be one just to know why. All I need is an open mind , hands to type, and Biogesic (incase my head hurts).

Do you ever wonder why girls keep on telling stories while boys tend to not listen? The answer is simple. (Drum roll please?). Girls don't shut up because boys don't listen, and boys don't listen because girls don't shut up. While I was looking at my ceiling counting molecules, I thought of it. My mind randomly buffer lots of ideas and to my surprise, I concluded one thing: I AM HUNGRY. So I grab something to eat and sat on my bed, murmuring things like I was talking to Buddha.

Some girls don't shut up (Please don't curse me. I used the term "some" to save myself. Swear, I'll do your thesis!). Based on my observations, a lot of girls talk about this and that. Ask them the latest episode of Gossip Girls, and they would even dish out the latest episode of America's Next Top Model. Holy cheesecake! You don't need to watch it for yourself! Anyway, to make this entry really substantial, I would dare myself to put this in the concept of relationship. And here where the fun begins. Trust me, you'll realize why I said some girls don't shut up (Please, read the whole entry before asking your dad to kill me. Thank you).

Personally, I think girls don't shut up because they CARE. One good thing about a girl is how she handles you with care. They talk a lot, but it's nothing to be scared of. It's not a disease! It's potentially present when they were born. Although we have what we call extrovert and introvert, I would choose not to include and expand this entry because of it. It may get a little bit boring. And frankly speaking, I'm not in the mood to elaborate those personality types coz there will be no examinations later on.

Fights are included in a relationship. Believe it or not, it's a package! When you enter a relationship, expect lots of trials and problems. In times of problems, I observed some girls who don't just shut up and don't let things cool for minute. Seriously, they we're like "What the hell blah blah blah! You said blah blah blah! Then blah blah blah! What now blah blah blaahhhh!!!" and BOOM! (w/ feelings) It became Cococrunch! If words could only kill, a lot of boys are dead now. But boys, you should know why some girls are like that. At some point, open your little mind and think. They only care. They won't get mad and continue talking if you did not do something stupid and undesirable like painting your nails with flowers or wearing their bra. No, seriously, they only care for you. HOWEVER, I realized that girls keep on talking as if they know every details! When they ask, they tend to not believe. And when you say the truth, they tend to think you're telling a lie. (Insert: Natutulog ba ang Diyos).

On the other hand, some boys don't listen. I told you earlier, it is due to the never-ending over-the-counter mouth girls purchased. Boys don't listen and pretend they don't hear anything because they don't want things to get worse. But they don't realize that not listening is actually the reason behind why girls don't shut up. Talking a lot is not a man's thing. A lot of guys keep their mouth shut and pretend they are actually listening. But deep inside they we're like "You b*tch, will you please let things cool for a minute?!" Girls, you should know that some boys only listen when you let things cool for a minute. You don't have to say words like knives for boys to realize that you're angry or what. THEY LISTEN with their own ways. Trust me, when boys talk about their feelings, you should throw a party.

Let me give a concrete scenario to apply this idea. Let's take SMOKING as an example to elaborate things mentioned above. Smoking is common among boys. For some girls, it's really a turn off. In a relationship, some girls keep on asking boys to stop smoking. And when boys can't, they will get angry. And when they get angry about this, sometimes it's the cause of fighting. Girls don't shut up as if they know everything. And boys don't listen as if they can do anything by themselves. Smoking is bad, but it's an addiction some boys can't kick in a snap. You should understand that there's a process stop it. Boys, you should know that some girls don't shut up about matters concerning about you because they only care. And Girls, don't think that boys don't actually listen. They have their own ways. Some boys choose to lose an argument than to lose their girl. You should know that. 

That's it, the ingredient of boys and girls. Anyway, Buddha asked me to let my mind rest now. Thanks for reading.

YOUR LOVE NUMBER

Hindi ka tao pag hindi mo naranasan ang F.L.A.M.E.S or ung H.O.P.E na laro nung kabataan mo pa. It's a game wherein aalamin mo kung bagay kayo ng labidabs mo. Eto makabago! Ang alamin ang LOVE NUMBER mo. Simple lang naman kung paano ba to gawin. Here are the steps:

1 - A J S

2 - B K T

3 - C L U

4 - D M V

5 - E N W

6 - F O X

7 - G P Y

8 - H Q Z

9 - I R

STEPS TO FOLLOW

1. Obviously, get a pen and a paper kasi hindi mo to magagawa mentally. MAHIRAP kaya wag ka nang umasa. HAHA

2. Write down your full name. Kahit hindi na kasama ang meaning ng middle initial mo, but still isama ang middle initial. INITIAL lang ah. (eg. JORDAN U. JUBINAL)

3. Write down kung kelan ka pinanganak. Obviously, ang birthday mo. Pero! Dapat using numbers na lang. (eg. Ako, AUGUST 14 1990. Meaning, dapat ganito ang isusulat mo - 08/14/1990.)

4. Then after doing that, tumambling ka. Gawin mo to three times. Then ihampas ang ulo sa pader, dapat my dugo. :)

5. Epal ng step 4. Ok back to reality. Ganito ang gagawin mo. Diba may mga digits sa taas. Get the digit that corresponds to the letters in your complete name. (eg. J-1, O-6, R-9, D-4, A-1, N-5, U-3, J-1, U-3, B-2, I-9, N-5, A-1, L-3, so the numbers are 16941531329513.)

6. Then add each number. Oo, iaadd mo lang bawat isa. Ang simple diba? Gawin mo na! (eg. 1+6+9+4+1+5+3+1+3+2+9+5+1+3 = 53)

7. Then do the same thing with your birthday. Iadd mo lang din ung numbers. Basta iadd mo na! HAHA. (eg. 0+8+1+4+1+9+9+0 = 32)

8. After that, simply add the result of your name and birthday. (eg. 53+32 = 85)

9. So after mo makuha ung sagot, just simply add 3. Bakit 3? Well it's believed to be the LOVE NUMBER. Basta mag-add ka ng 3. Ayoko na magexplain pa. AHAHAHA!! (eg. 85+3 = 88)

10. Ngayon nakuha mo na yung resulta, matuwa ka na dahil malapit ka na matapos. AHAHA. Take a break. Inhale.. exhale.. then magyosi break ka muna kung nagyoyosi ka. AHAHA! :)

11. After taking a break (HEHE. :P), Just simply add the digits in the final answer. Just add it until isang digit na lang ang matira. (eg. 8+8 = 16. 1+6 = 7)

Ok that's all! My LOVE NUMBER IS 7. Gawin mo lang din ung same procedure sa complete name and birthday ng labidabs mo, prospek mo or crush mo. And when nagawa mo na at parehas kayo ng LOVE NUMBER, it is said to be that you are meant to be or you're compatible with each other so much. :) ARTE? ahaha! Kase diba nga, the chance of having the same number is not that high kase magkaiba kayo ng name at birthday. So meant to be kayo pag parehas kayo ng LOVE NUMBER. DO IT! IT'S FUN! :)

NOTE: Para mas maganda ang daloy ng paghahanap mo ng LOVE NUMBER niyo, isipin mo lang mismo yung tao na gusto mo. :) I bet that you're actually thinking about him/her right now. HAHA. :P ENJOY!

Sweet Nothings

When you need to show how much you love your girl, you don't have to push yourself to the limit of being so dumb doing everything just to please her. Be as simple as you are, you don't have to be someone you're not. Trust me, it's better to say words from your heart, than to do some actions with your brain and only your brain. Remember, women fall in love with their ears. Simple words from the bottom of your heart are enough to let her feel your love.

Simple yet sweet things that a boy can do for a girl:

1. Know what are the thing that she don't like, and just be all the things that she would like.
2. Don't just ask her what completes her day, be the one who completes her life.
3. You may not be the one she's wishing for, but you could be the one she thought she would never have.
4. Don't overprotect her with your rules and power, just embrace her with your arms where she could find security and comfort.
5. Don't just give your time loving her, you have forever and a lifetime to be with her. 
6. Choose to lose in an argument, than to lose your girl.
7. Don't just respect her because she's your girl, respect her because she's a lady.
8. Doubt her words if you need to, but trust her actions coz it's all that counts.
9. Don't just forgive and forget, learn to understand and accept.
10. Don't count goodbyes, count the times when she comes back.
11. Don't be afraid to show your weakness, just show to her that she's your strenght.
12. Don't just give her everything that she wants, be everything that she needs.
13. Tell her that you WANT her by your side, and you NEED her in your life.
14. Tell her that you don't need a million reason to keep her, you just need one good reason not to let her go.
15. Hold her hands, and be the hand that lifts her veil.

A man don't need to be a superman just to do all the impossibles. Just like in a typical love story; simple thoughts, words and actions are enough for her to say "I LOVE YOU TOO..." So why do you have to worry doing everything to make her yours? When you got forever to make her fall in love over and over again. :)

Mind your Heart.

Minsan, kahit ayaw mo at di mo sinasadya, makakasira ka ng relasyon ng iba. Minsan, kahit na may girlfriend o boyfriend ka, hindi mo maiiwasang magkagusto o mainlove sa iba. At kadalasan, kahit mahal niyo ang isa't isa, hindi pwedeng maging kayo dahil nakatali kayo sa iba. Ganyan maglaro ang pag-ibig. Kahit na ang pinakamadiskarte o pinakamatalinong tao sa mundo, hindi maiiwasang masaktan kapag nagmahal.

Sa buhay mo, natural na ang madapa, basta babangon ka. Walang taong nadapa na habambuhay na nakahandusay sa lupa, at walang taong bumangon na hindi nadapa ulit. Ganyan pag nagmamahal, hindi pwedeng hindi ka masasaktan. Magkadikit na yan. Kahit lumuhod ka diyan sa bahay niyo papunta sa simbahan ng Baclaran, kakadasal na sana hindi ka masaktan, hinding hindi mangyayari yun, dahil sa masasaktan at masasaktan ka pa rin KUNG nagmamahal ka ng totoo.

Mabait ang Diyos, alam niya ang ginagawa niya at alam niya kung paano niya tayo ginawa. Magkahiwalay na ginawa ng Diyos ang UTAK at PUSO ng tao. Ginawa ang utak para MAG ISIP, ginawa ang puso para MAGMAHAL.Ginawa ang utak para maisip nating gamitin ang puso para magmahal. Pero kung mapapansin niyo, nilagay ang utak na mas mataas kesa sa puso, para ipaalala satin na hindi sa lahat ng pagkakataon, dapat unahin ang puso kesa sa utak. Kahit sabihin mong dapat gamitin ang puso pag tayo ay nagmamahal at hindi ang utak, isipin mo nalang.. "God placed our heart at the LEFT side of our body, that's why it's not always RIGHT." Ginawa ang utak para malaman natin ang pagkakaiba ng tama sa mali, at oo sa hindi. Yan ang hindi kayang gawin ng puso, dahil para sa puso.. lahat tama at walang hindi. Ginawa ang puso para maramdaman natin ang TAMA, ginawa ang utak para maisip natin ang MALI. Ang problema lang kasi sating mga tao, habang ginagamit ang puso para magmahal, mas lalong kumikitid ang utak. Puso lang ang may kakayahang makaramdam ng sakit na dulot ng pagmamahal. Kaya nga magkahiwalay silang ginawa, para maisip nating protektahan ang puso. Kaya gamitin ang utak, dahil lang yan ang may kakayahang makaisip kung tama o mali na ang ginagawa ng ating puso.

Sometimes, there are things that you don't want to hold on, but you can't let go. Bakit? Dahil alam ng utak na MALI na ang magpakatanga ka pa, at ramdam ng puso na TAMA na ipagpatuloy pa. Kaya ayaw nating bitawan kahit alam nating mali. At kaya gusto nating ipagpatuloy kahit alam nating mahirap. Pero teka.. alam niyo ba kung bakit dalawa kamay ng tao? Simple lang. Isa sa RIGHT side, para ipaalala sating kunin at gawin ang mga bagay na TAMA na magpapasaya satin. At isa sa LEFT, para ipaalala sating IWAN at kalimutan ang mga bagay na nagpapalungkot satin. One on the right side to HOLD ON, and one on the left side to LET GO. Dapat matuto tayong ibalance ang buhay natin, dahil tayo lang din naman mismo ang nagpapasaya at nagpapahirap sa buhay natin.

Alam niyo din ba kung bakit hindi sabay na humahakbang ang mga paa ng tao kapag naglalakad? Hindi lang para hindi tayo magmukhang tanga, kundi para ipaalala sa atin na sa bawat hakbang na ginagawa ng isa nating paa, may chance pang makabalik tayo sa pwesto natin ng ligtas dahil maiiwan sa likod ang isa nating paa. Kung sabay silang hahakbang habang tayo ay naglalakad, matututo na tayong magdalawang isip kung babalik pa ba tayo sa pwesto natin dahil walang kasiguraduhan na ligtas tayong makakabalik. Ganyan din sa buhay, minsan kelangan mong umatras sa mga bagay kapag alam mo na hindi na magandang ipagpatuloy pa. Minsan kase, may pagkakataon na napipilitan tayong ipagpatuloy ang isang bagay dahil nasimulan na natin. "It's easy to start SOMETHING, but it's hard to finish EVERYTHING." Kaya nga dapat, when you take the risk, be sure that it's worth the risk. Hindi ka tanga, kaya wag kang magpapakatanga. Hindi ka bobo, kaya magisip ka.

Mabait ang Diyos. Kaya wag kang mag-iisip na ikaw na ang pinakawalang kwentang tao sa mundo, na ikaw ang pinakapanget na nilalang o ikaw ang pinakamalas na tao dito sa mundo. Lahat ng tao nagkakaproblema. Walang taong nabuhay na ni minsan hindi nasaktan. Kung pakiramdam mo na MALAS ka, isipin mo na lang na SWERTE ka kase buhay ka. Smile. :D Life is LOVE.

Confidence, Sacrifice, Bravery and Trust.

What are CONFIDENCE, SACRIFICE, BRAVERY and TRUST?

CONFIDENCE is saying YES to what you think is YES.

SACRIFICE is saying NO to what you think is YES.

BRAVERY is saying NO to what you think is NO.

TRUST is saying YES to what you think is NO.

Relationship is full of surprises. It's like riding a roller-coaster. No matter how hard you try to make everything okay, still.. the chances that it might go VERY well is unclear. There's always a tendency to cry or to feel pain in a relationship. What matters most is the way you deal with all the problems TOGETHER.

NEVER DEMAND, just suggest. We shouldn't demand them to do whatever we like or to impose different rules. Especially if you're not yet married.

It's not right to demand them to follow us and to act as if there are consequences later on -"Mahal mo ba ko? Itigil mo yang pagyoyosi mo ngayon na! Kung hindi, break na tayo." or "Iinom ka na naman? Wag na kase! Umuwi ka na anong oras na oh. Pag-aawayan na naman nating yang pag-inom mo na yan."

Just simply suggest - "Kaya mo bang itigil ang pagyoyosi mo? Kase masama yan sayo eh. Try mo itigil ha? Para din naman sayo yan.. hindi para sakin." or "May inuman na naman ba kayo? Pwede bang konti lang inumin mo? Dalikado kase kung uuwi kang lasing lalo na ngayong gabi. Try mo dahan dahanin ah?"

You see the difference? It's not being stupid or numb - "Nagpapa-under ka sa syota mo kaya paeasy easy ka ng approach sa kanya kase takot kang mawala siya at ikaw ang masisi dahil sa mga sinabi mo.." - It's all about being WISE enough - "Hindi ka nagpapaunder, tinuturuan mo lang din siyang maging sensitive sa ginagawa niya, in a way na beneficial din sa kanya. The way we say things could actually affect the way they are to us. We should try to approach them without being so DEMANDING. It's not healthy for a relationship if there are too many rules to follow. It's not even right for us to set rules that would control them as if we're Gods. If you're not yet married, NEVER act as if you are. Things may change, but we have the power to make these changes as well. WHO KNOWS? Maybe the way you act negatively, would cause the person to leave you behind even if he/she loves you. Or maybe the way we say things, could give the person the reason to hurt us as well. So don't exaggerate things and act as if you're married.. coz even married couple finds it hard to deal with some problems together.. What more if you're not yet married? How would you deal if you're the one giving the reason for things to happen..?

Be wise enough to make your relationship last for a long time. Handle it with CONFIDENCE, SACRIFICE if it's worh sacrifing for, be BRAVE enough to admit your mistakes. And learn to TRUST yourself and your partner. :)

How Powerful Are Prayers?

"Prayers are land-line to heaven." 

Being hopeless romantic sucks, but prayers can save you from yourself. 

Falling in love is priceless - the feelings, happiness, smiles, giggles, the way she/he looked at you, the way she/he stares at you.. it all feels sooo damn good. When I was younger, I admit that I was once a hopeless romantic. Who in the world never felt like one? If there is, whoever you are.. well congratulations! You're on my list to kill. (Just kidding... No, I'm serious).

Let me tell you a story, a true story, so true that I want to make it a movie, or a short film. When I share this story with friends, they were like "Awww. That's sweet!" and I was like "Okay, how much do I need to pay you guys?". But seriously, until now I am very thankful with what I got, rather than what I really wanted.

They say, if God's answer is negative, the reason is affirmative. I salute with that. I believe God has plans for all of us. We just have to wait. It doesn't mean that if it did not happen, it won't happen. There are right time for right things at the right places. Everything are planned to be there, you just need to be patient and faithful. 

So here's my story. A story until now, I keep a secret. 

I once fell in love with a person named "Booger" (Note: Not the real name, and I prefer this name. It's cute! Though it sound disgusting). Booger and I had been good friends in my imaginary world. Yes, I feel like we're really close but that's just in the world created by my little brain. The moment I saw Booger, everything in my surrounding stopped, and I was like moving - as a result.. it freaked me out. Seriously, when I saw Booger, my world started changing and I felt a sudden change in me - Oh my Jesus Christ! I'M IN LOVE. The feeling was uncontrollable. Everytime Booger was around -  I stuttered, I couldn't stop smiling, I couldn't stop being dramatic, I couldn't stop being the center of attention, I couldn't stop looking at Booger, and I couldn't stop being in love. It's really true, when you fell in love, it feels so damn good. But when you fell in love with the wrong person.. well, that's a different story. I asked God to give Booger to me, but I felt like I need to do something rather than waiting alone. (Applying the concept of " Nasa Diyos ang Awa, Nasa Tao ang Gawa). 

I won't make this part long, coz it might get a little boring. Here's a list of what I did before to catch Booger's attention and to at least push destiny to bear with me:

• I always wait for Booger's service to arrive from school. I sat in front of their house and pretend looking at how birds fly and thinking how to solve Philippines' problem. And that's everyday, no exemption to the rule even if I am sick or what. I have to see Booger or else I might die. I remember calling Booger's service as "Service ng mga Bangkay", coz they all appear like dead creatures inside. They were all sleeping like they worked for 54 hours straight."
• I have my freedom notebook. It's a compilation of my unspoken feelings for Booger.
• Everything Booger gave to me, I considered it all to be a treasure. I put in a small box with all the garbage from Booger (the first one was the TOSTILLAZ wrapper, and eversince, it's my favorite junk food.)
• I always tell myself "I will never go home until I saw Booger straight from the eyes, which I managed to experience. Plus, it literally kill me everyday when Booger smiled at me. Seriously. Hahahaha!
• I have my theme song for Booger. You can search and listen to it. It's the most applicable song at that time. (Ewan ko - Soapdish)
• And lastly, everytime I go to mass, I always pray for Booger to fall in love with me, and be mine.

But I felt like something was missing. Something was not right. I have to push myself to the limit. I had to. So, with the blessings of all the elements of the world, I began asking and wishing for what seems to be impossible.

• I asked for signs like date, color, numbers, events and circumstances.
• I wished to be with Booger for not less than 10 minutes a day. We hadn't been together with each other for that long. And that's serious. We never had been together to talk, catch up with each other or whatever thing to do. We're good friends, but not as close as you imagine.
• I wished Booger to look at me in my eyes like I'm the only person around. Haha!
• I wished we could spend more time during weekends.
• I wished Booger to tell me everything I need to know in my life. Basically I want Booger to be the one teaching me how to live my life.
• I wished to see Booger every single day of my life.
• And lastly, I wanted Booger to fall in love with me as well.

Having all these in my mind, I realized I had been wishing for what seems to be impossible to have. Booger's standards were really high and I am not meant to be that person. I felt wishing for something that's never gonna happen in my life. But still I did wish for it all. After all, what do I have to lose anyway?

However, I got tired of waiting. Nothing was changing, except my complexion due to sun exposure during C.A.T. Plus, I realized I've been outdated with the latest news about my friends. I focused more with what I want, and ignored what I really had in my life. I was so stupid, ignorant, imbecile, moron, insolent.. (C'monnn Dan, think of other negative adjectives to pretend you are intelligent! :P)

October 2, 2003, the very first time Booger smiled at me, was the best day of my life. So ever since I started to make it as my OWN anniversary and make 2 as my lucky number. (How stupid and hopeless could I get?!) I had been loving Booger for 3 years in a row without asking anything in return. And that's serious. I devoted my time and effort for something I wouldn't have in my life. So later on I realized to just give up and continue living. After all, even if I move on or what, the world would not slow down for me, I still got to get moving.

I decided to give up and ignore my feelings. I had to. I had been so focused with Booger and forgot that I have my own life to deal with. So yeah, I diminished every single memory I have, including the freedom notebook I kept for a long time. 

After years, I began renewing myself. Booger and I, well we're still the same. It was night of Dec 1 (I forgot the year, but of course I remember the date coz I had written it), I realized I missed Booger. I thought of all the things I did for Booger, and I couldn't help but just to laugh at myself. I prayed that night. I told God "Please Papa God, Dec 2 bukas. Alam mo naman favorite number ko ang 2 diba? Sana makita ko si Booger or sana may mangyare man lang na kakaiba bukas, Pakita lang ni Booger na importante ako, kahit sa anong paraan, okay na ko. Thank you." I prayed for something I want. It's just a reward for myself for being so strong in moving on without anything in return. So why not just a little twist for my day? After all, it's been a while.

The next morning, our maid woke me up. She said that someone's waiting for me outside. That time I wasn't in the mood to wake up and walk. I knew it would be those friends of mine who wanted to spend the day in our house. But still I checked it. And what do I saw? It's Booger, smiling and waiting outside. :)

I went down after I brushed my teeth. I couldn't stop smiling. 

       "Oh bakit ka andito?" Saying while I was smiling with all my heart.

I got the simplest yet romantic answer in my entire existence..

       Booger said, "Ah wala.. namiss lang kita." 

That moment, I died. But I have to be really alive to keep the conversation going. I was so happy! And I couldn't help but just smile all the time. Then Booger said, "Oh sige, napadaan lang talaga ako kase namiss kita."

You know what, based on my own experience, I can tell you guys.. GOD ANSWERS OUR PRAYERS. I found myself experiencing what I have been wishing for, but the other way around (Hehe.) Before I was asking for some signs like dates and colors, Now it seems that I dont have to do it anymore. Before, I wanted Booger to stay with me for at least not less than 10mins, Now, Booger spend time with me more than an hour and a day is not enough for us to talk and be together. Before, I wanted Booger to see me like I was the only person around, Now I'm the only one Booger can lean on when things go wrong and answers are hard to find. I was praying that we could spend more time together on Saturdays and Sundays coz we dont have any classes. Now we spend more time not only on weekends, but also during weekdays even if we do have classes the next day. If before I was wishing Booger can look at me straight into my eyes, Now, Booger won't only look at me in the eyes but can also tell me if my face is dirty. (Only True Friends Will Tell You If Your Face Is Dirty. Remember that.) If before I was wishing to see Booger everyday, Now I don't need to wish for that, i will be able to see Booger if I wanted to. I just have to simply send a text "wala ako kasama. san ka?" the most often reply I would received "teka, puntahan kita." And If before I was wishing Booger to love me.. nahhh.. I think I don't have to. I can feel the love even if its not the kind of love I had wished for.

My prayers were not answered the way I want it to be, but I got blessings that I never expected to have. After so long of praying and waiting, we're now together. Not as lovers, but BEST FRIENDS. Yes, we are now best of friends. No commitments, no break ups. Pure love, mutual love and unconditional love. It's better than being together, at least I found a great friend, and God gave me what I need to have - someone to rely on when things go wrong, and someone in my life who's a living proof that GOD answers prayers. 

I Dare to Quit

Quitting Smoking is hard. Whoever said to apply "mind over matter" to this habit, I guess he's one of the people I envy a lot.

Why do people smoke? Based on personal experience - smoking is a stress-reliever; it kills boredom; the sensation of smoking after gluttony is relaxing; that "moment" in the restroom while doing your thing is pretty much relaxing as well; drinking while smoking compliments each other; and lastly, when you can't count a friend, you can now buy one at your local store. All of these reasons are mainly based on experience. But I do believe that I am not the only one with these reasons to rely on.

In the cycle of my boring life, I told myself to quit for a couple of times already. And I always fail like Plankton (Spongebob Squarepants). People should understand that kicking the habit is not as easy as ABC. If it is, I guess I'd have more stars in my hands now rather than nicotine in my lungs. But when reality sets in, the idea of quitting is as hard as getting high grades in math, and at some point, disturbing. I, for once, decided to quit again for the Nth time. I was able to quit before, but now I guess the word "quit" is sooo magical that I can't believe it even exists. Sticking to new life without smoking is challenging. But the truth is, the challenge lies in the way you handle yourself, not with the idea of kicking the habit.

I am one of those people who tried so hard to quit and to quit. I made many plans and lasted for months, but the habit keeps on purging out of my head. Quitting may cause you annoyance, disturbance and other -ance that is so negative I don't want to post. To sum up all my self-made intervention program, here's a list:

• I asked friends to support me. It's really effective. Almost everyday and every hour, a good samaritan would remind me not to smoke. Having that feeling that people believe in you was the best feeling in the entire alien race.
• I posted my progress. Utilizing technology, I keep myself and others posted with my everyday struggle. It's really motivating to know that they were supportive.
• Everyday alarm for reminder. I set an alarm every lunch and dinner, time where I know urge to smoke would attack me.
• Replacement Procedure. Whenever I feel like smoking, I eat fruits (mostly apples), to divert my appetite.
• I kept a journal. Seriously, I tracked down my everyday progress and feelings by jotting down notes. And when I feel like smoking, I read it over and over again.
• I created a calendar. 10 days would only mean 1 week. And at the end of every week, I treated myself with an awesome body massage and bought new clothes (really motivating).
• I forced myself to be a composer. Whenever I feel the urge, I divert my attention by creating music. Compiling all my compositions, maybe I would get a platinum award.
• I had an online journal. Aside from the journal I had kept, I used technology to save my experiences. So that when my journal would be burned to ashes or washed away by a tsunami, at least I have it covered.
• During weekends, I intended to wake up late. So that I won't smoke in the morning.
• I created an account in Livestrong.com. It's like a support group for you to quit smoking.

To be really honest, there were many plans I formulated aside from that. But seems like the list is never-ending and my hands are not in the mood to type it all. The bottom-line is, I helped myself to quit. And as a result, I was smoke free for 3months in a row.

But walls of china fell on me when I smoked again. That day made me feel like a worthless shit. I gave up that 3months just for a single stick... and that single stick destroyed my plans since then. I decided to quit again but it seems like any plans was not working. I began to smoke again. More sticks than ever. So I decided to quit smoking intermittently - smoke today, not the next day, then smoke again. It was effective. But once again I failed. I even tried to rehabilitate myself by staying at my sister's place, and I still failed. I tried those interventions that I made and I failed. I asked for a real support group and yet I failed. You see, it seems like my whole life is a failure. And that idea lingered in my head for a very long time.. until now.

One event led me to try and quit again. I was told I am the ugliest man on earth. Yeah like seriously. Ever since, I tried quitting and did that intermittent way of kicking the habit. I was successful, but not too long. I was really devastated, hoping my life would be better sooner or later. I told myself "I need to fix everything. I want that person to realize how handsome I am" But later realized that I am motivating myself through revenge, and it's not good. Hatred had driven me mad and all I could think about is having my revenge by renewing myself. However, to my dismay, I haven't done anything to improve myself AGAIN. I was the same person told to be the ugliest man on earth.

But last night (November 29, 2011), it hit me. I told myself "Hey, I want to change. But I'm not gonna change for anybody. I will change for myself. I want my life to be better, and that's by believing I can." It may sound odd, but yeah it's true. With the guidance of all the fairies of the mountains, I am gonna quit again. For the Nth time in my life, I will try again. One thing I learned in this journey of quitting is that "It doesn't matter if you fail so many times, as long as you try, you should not give up." I looked at the mirror and realized that I haven't looked at my eyes lately. I saw how handsome I am. Really, i'm not being boastful. It's just that I have to believe in whatever I want to achieve or to be. If I don't believe myself, then who the hell in the world would believe me?

I feel quitting this time is different. I feel really EXCITED about it. Before, I was like nervous to the bone of when my urges would attack, withdrawals, sensations.. But now I feel like I can do it this time. One beauty of consistently failing to quit, is that I get to learn the pattern of my urge. I now know the events, circumstances and even people who would drive me to smoke. I guess I did not fail at all. I LEARNED. And I LEARNED A LOT.

So for people who wanted to quit smoking, I want you to know that mental pressure is your worst enemy. Set your mind. Plan interventions. Fail if you must. Stand up again and try. Nobody said that quitting would be easy. You are not alone. I myself is one of those hopeless quitter. But look, even if I failed so many times already, I still got the guts to try. Why? COZ I WANT TO KICK THE HABIT before it kills me. And for those people who'd try to smoke, for goodness sake, just go to your room, study your lesson or watch tv or whatever right thing to do than smoking. You don't get the idea of how hard it is to quit, and I am hoping you'd realize that it's really freaking hard by reading this post.

I will keep y'all posted in this journey. I know I would be successful. And by that time, I will be an advocate of healthy living by kicking the habit of smoking. You should know by now that smoking kills. So if you still want to live longer and see your grandchildren in the future, BETTER QUIT NOW. Not tomorrow, not next week but TODAY.

Gigantiform Cementoma: The Boy with a Tumour for a Face

"Am I in the position to complain about my life?" my conscience asked.

Gigantiform Cementoma is a rate, autosomal dental tumor. It is benign, but without intervention it can result in severe disfigurement of the jaws. The cause of this tumor is currently unknown. This is an exceedingly rare tumor with only a handful of documented cases worldwide. In addition, it is the familial occurrence of cemental masses in the jaws; inherited as an autosomal dominant characteristic. I read in some articles that Gigantiform Cementoma is believed to be caused by abnormal growth of tooth or teeth. [1 2 3]

Novemthree Siahaan, a young boy from Indonesian Bataam Island, was reported to have this Gigantiform Cementoma at the age of two. To cut the story short, fortunately, heaven sent his savior in the form of Dr. David Lui, a Buddhist missionary from Tzu Chi Foundation. Novemthree was sent to Taiwan for the operation, and agreed that Tzu Chi Foundation would fund his treatment and the ongoing treatment in the future. The operation lasted over a fifteen week period, done by a group of specialist spearheaded by Dr. Cheng. The tumor was so large that it actually compressed his whole face. The surgeons could not fully attempt to remove the tumor because of the possible risk. They need to leave the part of the tumor to reshape the jaw of Novemthree. Dr. Cheng and the group performed tracheotomy for him to breath. In the end, he responded to all the surgeries wonderfully during all the weeks of stress, pain and hope.

However, after all hopes are up, Novemthree passed away on September 4, 2005. The tumor began to regrow and surgeons decided that it was too risky to have another surgery. Sadly, he also developed respiratory complications from which he didn't recover.

"Novemthree was a kind, wise and clever kid. Whenever he was feeling ill he never once complained to us, he simply took all his suffering on his own." said his father.

I was looking at the mirror the other day, and complained with all the freaking pimples and dark spots in my face. I feel really devastated every time a pimple would grow out of nowhere. I come to the point that I asked God, "WHY ME?!". Suddenly, Novemthree's face flashed in my mind. I remembered his story, and asked myself "Am I in the right position to complain about my looks or my life?" I sat in silence, thinking if I really do have the rights to complain with my looks and life. 

You see people, we complain a lot. Admit it, we are very conscious of how we look in public. Some people even resort to waste their money for beautification. We spend money for nothing but waste in the end. It's how we live, we enjoy our life now, then complain later. There are plenty of things we complain about, but there are people who are wishing that what we complain could be in their hands.

We complain of how hard and painful it is to walk for miles. But how about those who don't actually have feet? How they wish to have your feet. Do they complain? Yes, they complain, but imagine how many people reported in news that most of them accepted life, be happy and be a role model.

Scott McIntyre

This guy joined American Idol and luckily passed the screening and be part of the group. He is Scott McIntyre. He is BLIND. I think he can see a little light. Despite his status, he managed to be part of American Idol, and SING. Some people I know complain how irritated they are about the blinding light of the sun. I mean yes, literally they complain. Ask Scott if he complain about being blind. Maybe he'd say YES, but no matter how hard he complain, he can't do anything about it. He still wishes to see how beautiful our world is. 

I encountered people who complain about the same old foods sold in the canteen. I encountered people who devoted their lives going on DIET and actually lessen their food intake to eliminate fats in their body. I watched news about Africa, I bet you also know that they experienced food shortage there. GO TO AFRICA and ask people there if they go on diet and actually not eating anything to lessen their fats. GO TO AFRICA and ask if they complain about the same old foods sold there. ASK THEM, and tell it to my face if they COMPLAIN.

We complain a lot. That's how others live. I believe that we don't have contentment. We strive for whatever would satisfy us. It's okay. But at some point we have to set limitations, especially if the things we are striving for could damage others or ourselves. I want you to appreciate your life, but I know it would be hard. I want you to realize how lucky you are in your position, but I know it would be hard. And I want you to see how beautiful our world is, but due to some circumstances, events and even people, I know it would be hard. Life really is unfair. No matter how perfect you think your life is, still at some point you would strive to get something you don't have and ignore something that you have. That's the system of life. That's how we live. 

In the back of my mind, I still hope that if you can't understand why your life is like the way it is now and not the one you wanted, I hope for you to accept who you are. It's the first step of accepting the kind of life you have right now. Accept who you are, and you'll start to accept your life. 

VALUE OF TIME

To realize the value of ONE YEAR

Ask a student who failed his or her AP or board exam

To realize the value of ONE MONTH

Ask a mother who has given birth to a premature baby

To realize the value of ONE WEEK

Ask an editor of a weekly magazine

To realize the value of ONE DAY

Ask a daily wage laborer who has ten kids to feed

To realize the value of ONE HOUR

Ask the lovers who are waiting to meet

To realize the value of ONE MINUTE

Ask a person who missed the train

To realize the value of ONE SECOND

Ask a person who has survived an accident

To realize the value of ONE MILLISECOND

Ask a person who won a silver medal in the Olympics

There are plenty of things to value in our lives. It's not just the material things and ourselves. We can learn to be happy if we start to accept ourselves and our life. Value everything in life. Sometimes the smallest thing in this world plays the biggest role in our lives. Live your life the way you should be, but remember to always set limitations. For our despair and sorrows could be someones happiness and contentment. 

REFERENCES

1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gigantiform_cementoma

2. http://www.drugs.com/dict/gigantiform-cementoma.html

3. http://www.encyclo.co.uk/define/Gigantiform%20cementoma

7 Habits of Highly Effective TEENS

Filled with great ideas and lessons to live by. This book primarily tackles about teenage life. So for teenagers out there who want to renew their lives, go grab a copy and start reading this one.

This is the first time I would be writing a book review (Insert: Thunder Claps). Spotlight please? Anyway, it's kinda disturbing for people I know that I created the habit of reading books and magazines. They really don't believe that I am actually READING articles/books, or even watching daily news of how people die in a creepy car accident or how the president changed his/her mind of what clothes to wear. To my surprise, reading really is beneficial. Especially if you want to kill boredom or pretend you're intelligent. :)

The 7 habits of highly effective teens is a book written to inspire teenagers out there. Lessons and stories tackled are true to life and very inspiring. Though I am beyond my teenage years, I still feel like a teenager (They say life starts at 40, so I conclude that it's somehow connected to being teen, making me a teen until 39  years old. Hehe). I read the book for two reasons; (1) The title caught my attention; and (2) I wanted to feed my mind. For reason #2, you may find it hard to believe. Neither do I. I mean what the heck? Feed my mind?! I don't want to focus discussing this one, or I'll bleed internally. I'll spare you from my listen-to-my-nonsense-mouth-blabbering habit. 

You thought I would be dishing out all the 7 habits? Nah. If I would do that, would you read the book yourself? Or if I do that, would you really learn something from what my hands would write now? Definitely not. Maybe yes. But the sacrifice of exercising your eyes and mind in reading is the key to everlasting migraine. Just kidding! I mean hey, you'd feel the eternal sunshine and delicate feeling of all the lessons tackled in the book if you'd spare little of your time to sit down and burn your eyes reading. To my surprise, the book touched my life, paving a way to lessons to live by.

"You don't have to be perfect, you just have to be making progress." 

"One of the keys to happiness is a bad memory." 

"Winning means rising everytime you fall."

"Don't allow fears to make your decisions. YOU MAKE THEM." 

These are few quotes I started to live by after reading the book. There are plenty of mind opening quotations in the book itself - things that you thought nothing, would mean everything to someone else. You better read the book or else you just wasted your time reading this. Haha! Nah, just blabbering around! Thanks for reading this post mate. Cheers, and READ. :)